Two Bad Tastes That Taste Bad Together

Well, someone has finally managed to make Vodka even more unappealing to me than ever. I dislike Vodka with a passion. To me it tastes like rubbing alcohol, and I much prefer the oh- so subtle herbal notes of a fine gin. Occasionally I can stomach the odd flavored vodka, but recently distilleries have gone a little off the rails looking for new and exciting flavors. I can get behind fruit. Who doesn’t love a refreshing splash of fruit in their cocktail? I understand how garlic flavored vodka could enhance a bloody mary. Herbal vodkas? Well that just brings me back to drinking gin. I can even get behind bacon flavored vodka because, let’s face it, everything is better with bacon. But an Alaskan distillery in Wasilla Alaska has managed to take the flavored vodka craze one step to far by presenting the world with salmon flavored vodka. There are so many things wrong with this concoction that I don’t know where to begin. Let me start by saying that I hate salmon. I always have and I always will. This is the last taste I want in my alcohol. In fact, add some grapefruit juice, and I would consider it the cocktail from hell. Putting my personal prejudices aside, I did and informal survey of people who like salmon, and they were beyond disgusted at this concept. Just the idea of salmon marinating in vodka in order to impart its flavor and aroma to the alcohol makes most people say ewwww!! Then we come to the color of this alcohol. Apparently imparting the unique fishy flavor to the liquor causes it to take on the pinkish, orangey hue of the salmon flesh. That, my friends, is just sick and wrong. Vodka should be clear unless it is in a dirty martini. I guess staring at Russia everyday can make you do some pretty crazy things.