I’d like to declare a new awareness month to call attention
to a potentially horrible health crisis: A mysterious illness seems to be
infecting nonprofit foundations that raise money for cancer research.
If things continue at this pace, we’ll all be back to
relying on the federal government for research funding… and we all know that’s
a recipe for progress. (Snicker.) Smart people everywhere are amping up
preventive health measures as the “race for the cure” is looking ever more like
a grueling marathon.
Lance Armstrong finally being exposed as a cynical liar and
cheat – albeit a liar and cheat legitimately missing one testicle – undeniably
spells bad news for LiveStrong, his foundation to support cancer research.
Yeah, Nike dropped Lance while continuing to support the
foundation. And Lance stepped down as board chair (while retaining an active
seat on the board). But how long will that last? Methinks it’s only a matter of
time before those yellow bracelets stand for shame rather than hope.
Add LiveStrong’s inevitable demise to Komen Foundation’s
bizarre and totally avoidable plunge into the nation’s most polarized political
issue. Komen was caught in crossfire it single-handedly created. Their
unprovoked attack on Planned Parenthood (which, ahem, serves as a safety net
for breast cancer screening for low-income women) was so unfathomably
unnecessary. And so tragically mishandled.
Perhaps cancer nonprofits missed some sort of critical
inoculation against the folly of misguided leadership?
Generations from now, it’s possible that anthropologists
will sift through our landfills only to uncover an entire society’s strange
infatuation with pink EVERYTHING, along with millions of yellow wrist
artifacts, all bearing the same coy, oblique message.
Warring nation states? Dueling religions? Or the remains of
powerful cults with once-noble missions?
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